Jan. 29, 2021

Avoid this ONE “mindset mistake” at ALL COSTS

Avoid this ONE “mindset mistake” at ALL COSTS

What's happening y'all? This is an honest to God, real live actual planned podcast episode. So let's dig right on into it. I got a question, a good question, the other day. I forgot who asked me so I can't credit them that, but whoever you are, thanks...

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What's happening. Y'all this is an honest to God, really have actual planned podcast episodes, still trying to work out like the details. Well, the habits really between doing like Q and a, uh, re broadcasts and then actual planned. Episodes, but this one was planned one. So let's dig right on into it. I got a question, a good question the other day, and I forgot who asked me, so I can't credit them that, but whoever you are thanks for asking it.
The question was, what three beliefs do you wish you had when you were 20? Which was really a good question. You know, the, all the self-help folks, uh, as a generalization. We'll tell you that your beliefs affect your thinking in your thinking affects your decisions and your decisions that affect your actions in the Euro, in your actions affect your life.
Yada, yada, yada. I believe all of that to be true. Only reason I'm yada yada yada in it is because I know you've heard it a billion times, just like I have it. Um, man, what a good question. So I spent a lot of time thinking about it and I don't know if I've got three. But I've got one that I wish I would have, uh, I could, I could have installed in my twenties and here it is, uh, judgment from other people is both temporary.
And irrelevant. Um, and so here's what I mean and why I think it's important. I, in reflecting on my own life, I'm 48, so I haven't lived that long, but, uh, in reflecting back on my life as an adult, The overwhelming majority of bad decisions that I have made. And the overwhelming majority of problems that I have encountered in my life are a direct result of my personally.
Acting in accordance with what I thought would prevent people from thinking badly of me and that ranges from business decisions where, Oh, well, if I do this of business, then maybe people will think less of me because it's not as professional as another type of business, all the way to. I'm going to agree to do this thing that I don't have any interest in doing whatsoever because I don't want the other person to think less of me like to think that I'm rude or inconsiderate or something.
Um, and so literally like every freaking thing that was really catastrophic, really bad, uh, as a direct result of that belief that it matters. What someone else thinks, and that if someone thinks badly of you, um, that it's going to somehow like be the end of the world, I let it affect relationships, business decisions, everything.
Um, I'll give you a concrete example. All right. So I created the belief. I wonder how I even got to this stupid belief, but you never know. Right. It's I created this belief that most people who buy information products don't use them. And I think that's probably safe to say, you know, and I wish it were not true, but it is.
Um, I think, you know, I know like in our own business, swear to God, We track, like if someone buys a downloadable ebook or whatever, we'll track to see if they click the download link. And if they don't, you know, which most of them did not, uh, we have to put them in a multi-part followup sequence to nag them.
To make sure they click the link to get the thing they bought. Okay. So with that in mind, I think it's safe to make the assumption that most people who buy information products, um, they don't actually use them in there for, they might not get the result they want, regardless of what's in the dang product, you know?
So. I was able with my awesome brain insert sarcasm here to form the belief that if I sell information products, people will think that I'm a bad person because they might not use the information products and therefore not get the results that they want. Right. And so as a result of that belief and my concern that others would think I was a bad person because someone bought a book and didn't read it.
I pulled back. On creating and selling information products. And I went farther down into the rabbit hole of doing higher ticket consulting and done for you stuff and agency level stuff, which were all like really, really good learning experiences. And man, if you want to get good at something, you know, you go into consulting where you have to be good at it and your learning curve will jump up so fast.
Um, but that's a huge driver in why I did that because I wanted to be able to, like, in the, I don't know, you know, once per year circumstance where someone asks me what I do for a living, I wanted to be able to say something that would cause them to have a favorable opinion of me and was concerned that, Oh, you know, I create information products that help people grow their brand or whatever.
I was worried that they would think ill with me. So here's the thing. All right. Maybe they would, maybe they wouldn't, I can guarantee you this, like these results are typical, no need for disclaimer. It does not matter what you do. People are going to think badly of you. Um, not all of them, of course, but some right.
Some are going to think badly of you. Who cares what you're doing. I mean, you could literally be walking down the street. Giving away money to anybody that you see. And someone might think that you're a bad person because you didn't jump on a plane and fly to somewhere else where they might need the money more than the people who you're currently just handing out a hundred dollar bills to out of the goodness of your heart.
Right. Doesn't matter. People are gonna think badly of you. And, um, that is okay. And, and here's why it is just irrelevant. It doesn't matter. The only time that it matters is if you are building a brand and you are wanting to establish Goodwill within your prospect base, you know, obviously it matters if they have a good opinion of you and the easiest way as we all know and agree, hopefully.
The easiest way to form a, have someone form a good opinion of you is by being helpful to them. So that's fine, but everybody else who cares, it really doesn't matter, right? Like if there's some dude right now, I guarantee you right now, there's somebody that is hating on you, you know? And it doesn't matter if like you're a shut in and four people have seen you in the past year.
One of them is at least thinking something negatively. It's just human nature. It doesn't matter. Right. And so if you never knew about it in your life, it would never affect you. So that is the other belief that I wish, or the other part of that belief that I would love to have gone back in time and inserted into my mind, which is it is irrelevant.
What they think it just does not matter. Um, I have had, you know, uh, you may or may not know, but have been, I don't want to say attacked because I don't feel like a victim, but, um, have been the subject of a, of several like blogs and stuff that hate marketing people and say, we're all bad. And we do bad things and we're harming society, et cetera.
And so I've been like a topic on those blogs in the past. And, um, Had absolutely no effect whatsoever on my business. Like nothing, zero none. And if I never knew about it, It would have had no effect on my life. No, I knew about it. And I was like, man, I wonder why these people were saying these things. I don't know them.
I've never met them. I don't think they've ever bought my stuff. This is weird. And then, you know, am I doing something wrong that I don't know about and kind of fell down that trap if I'd have never known about it. Okay. It would have had absolutely no effect on my life, which means. It's irrelevant. If there's a thing that's occurring.
And if you don't know about it, it will have no effect on your life, your business, your income, your ability to contribute to the world. Then it should deserve zero where we were attention. But so many people, myself included will fall into that habitual trap of making a decision based on what they think people will think of them.
And I got to tell ya, Like every single catastrophic, really bad decision I have made, ultimately comes down to that root of, well, if I do this, then people will think this way and that's why I'm going to do it. Or if I don't do this yeah. You get it. Right. You understand? So I would, if, if I could do anything and there was one belief that would be it.
I think, you know, it's just like, get rid of that one. Just go out, be a good person. The only, only thing that matters is that you're helping people and let your actions speak for themselves. You're never going to please everybody. I'm not either. And that's okay. It's cool. All right. So I didn't completely answer the question.
I, you know, I don't have three, uh, beliefs, uh, maybe come up with the other two, but I was thinking about the question and that one just kept coming to me and I wanted to share it with you. The people, the only people that matter are your marketplace and your customers, and the best way to have someone form a good opinion of you.
Is to deliver as much value as possible treat people like you would expect them to be three, but like you would want them to treat you and just help. That's it. That's the big secret. Okay. There you go. An official planned episode. I hope you have a good day. Thanks for listening. Take it easy.